I made it, friends. My second year of law school is complete.
This year had lots of highs and lows. I received my lowest grade ever. I sat in on oral arguments at the Supreme Court of the United States. I was still bleeding from birth when I took my Family Law final exam. I read Constitutional Law cases in the hospital while my newborn babies snoozed away. I learned more than I ever thought I could while pregnant and postpartum, and studied even more.
I also had my first moment of, ‘I’m not sure I want to do this anymore.’ This journey is hard. It is lonely. Somedays, it truly feels impossible. But the best part about being a mom in law school is that you have your kids to remind you why you keep pushing through the challenges, why you continue to show up no matter what:
“So when you’re done with school, you can take us to Disney, Mommy!”
Okay, so my kids don’t really understand what lawyers do, yet. But, they do know that certain aspects of our life will change once I graduate, and I think we’re all looking forward to that in certain ways.
But, let’s not get ahead of ourselves — I still have two classes this summer, the MPRE in August, one more semester of classes this fall, graduation in December, the bar on my twins’ first birthday, and then the fun begins! Until then, you can find me at home, turning Supreme Court case names into silly nursery rhymes to sing to the babies.
Never let anyone tell you that you can’t achieve your dreams once you’re a mother. If there’s one thing I want anyone to take away from anything I write, it’s that.
Week #18 Favorites
- This brownie recipe. If you’ve read my most recent blog post, you know that money has been tight around here lately. With the cost of living rising what seems to be monthly, but salaries staying relatively the same, I think most families are feeling the squeeze. In an effort to save as much money as possible, I am trying to learn how to make all of my favorite treats at home, so I’m not dropping $18 on four Crumbl cookies when I could spend the same amount of money to make probably two hundred cookies in my own kitchen. This week, I was really craving brownies, something I have never attempted to make before. After recipe shopping for a bit, I settled on this one, and oh my word it is SO good!
- My noise-cancelling headphones. These are truly an essential if you have newborn twins. I don’t use this trick often, but if it’s witching hour or bedtime, and I know there will be lots of crying through diaper changes and pajama swaps, I go ahead and use these so that I don’t get wildly overstimulated. One of the saddest parts about having twins is not being able to console them both at the same time, and especially at bedtime when they’re already tired, that usually means one twin is crying uncontrollably while I change the other’s diaper. And then when I move on to Baby #2, Baby #1 starts crying. It’s tough, and me being overstimulated makes it even worse, so listening to some gentle music and singing along helps both me and the babies.
- Writing and blogging. If you’ve read my first few newsletters, you know that I’ve been writing consistently since I was nine years old. Whether it be journaling, poetry, fiction, academic articles, or blogging, writing has consistently been a huge part of my life. I am not sure if I would be who I am without writing, and I am beyond grateful to have spent so much of my life not just honing my craft, but enjoying this hobby.
Week #18 Highlights
- I ran a full loop (7 miles!) around Salem Lake. I have been slowly building up my mileage for over a month now, because although I was eager to return to running postpartum, I didn’t want to overdo it and end up injured (done that before, not fun). I started by going on 2-3 mile runs during the week, then 3-4 miles, and eventually I was running over 5 miles each run. This meant that I was able to run longer on the weekends, and finally being able to run around Salem Lake was a huge milestone for me! It’s crazy to think that I used to run anywhere from 14 to 26 miles around the lake, but for now, I am very, very happy that I made it seven miles.
- I took Eloisa with me to my last day of my second year of law school! She has been begging to come to school with me again for quite some time. Since I started back in August 2024, Eloisa has sat in on a 2.5-hour Contracts class, 2-hour Constitutional Law class, and as of Friday, a 3-hour First Amendment: Religion class. I warned her extensively beforehand that the class was over three hours long, but she insisted that she wanted to come. About an hour into class, she told me she didn’t want to be there anymore, and I whispered back, “Well I don’t really want to be here either, but too bad!” Somehow we made it through the whole class, and that concluded my 2L year! Well, mostly. I still had a final to look forward to, but for morale, I treated Friday as my last day!
- Both of the twins learned how to roll over. Evelyn has had it down for maybe two weeks now, and Emersyn has finally decided to join in on the fun! They can now both roll over onto their stomachs, and back onto their backs, all by themselves. And Evelyn especially can roll herself all around the room! Now that they’re both moving and grooving, leaving the room for even a few minutes can be tricky. When I’m making dinner, for example, I find myself having to go “reset” a baby every couple of minutes. If it’s already like this, I’m scared for when they start truly crawling!
Self-Care Tip of the Week: Treat Yourself
I am notoriously bad at this. Anytime there happens to be extra money in the budget, or I’m gifted cash or a gift card, I always end up spending it on anything but myself.
I’ll buy my son the new socks he needs, or buy the kids a new board game, or maybe stock up on paper towels or dried oats. If I’m feeling really crazy, I might buy a candle when I’m grocery shopping. But rarely do I buy something that’s just for me. I don’t think things like nipple cream or new bras count as a treat, but rather more of a necessity.
But this past week, I volunteered at an event at school, and was given a $25 Amazon gift card as a thank-you. I started thinking of what I would spend it on — maybe more books for my daughter, or a wreath for the front door — when I realized that I should buy something that is just 100% for me.
That doesn’t mean I’m spoiling myself, or wasting the money. It’s been a hard few months, and I deserve nice things just like my husbands and kids and house do. I don’t know what I’m going to get yet, so stay tuned. If you’re like me, and it’s been awhile since you’ve splurged, let this be your sign: treat yourself!
See you guys next week!
Step by Step Parenting 