Step by Step Parenting

Eloisa, my first baby, just turned six years old! It’s honestly hard to believe. I know every parent says this, but it really does feel like yesterday that I was bringing her home from the hospital. Having a baby during a global pandemic came with certain challenges, but I think one of the best things to come with it is I lived in that newborn bubble for almost the whole first year of Eloisa’s life. I was able to be a stay-at-home mom right up until her second birthday, and I am so, so thankful that I got to spend that time with her while she was small.

That being said, a lot has happened since then! She gained two new stepsiblings, started grade school, travelled all over North America, became a big sister to her younger twin sisters, learned to read and write, and so much more. She feels more like my little sidekick or tiny best friend than she does my daughter, and I will be holding on to that as long as I can.

There have been lots of bittersweet milestones this past year, too. Especially because I spent most of it pregnant or postpartum, I rarely carry Eloisa anymore. She obviously hasn’t needed me to rock her to sleep for a long time. She can get dressed by herself, read by herself, and recently she’s gotten really good at smaller chores like taking dishes to the sink, setting the table, and putting some of her laundry away.

Some chores aren’t her favorite (helping to feed the twins is her least favorite), but others, she’ll practically fight her siblings to do (feed the dog). As a recovering eldest daughter, I really try hard not to ask too much of Eloisa or her older stepsister, but Eloisa’s growing independence has been nice.

If I had to pick one thing I’m most proud of Eloisa for, though, it would be how good she’s gotten at communicating her thoughts and feelings — no easy feat for a five year old! Whether she’s frustrated, sad, excited, or a mix of all three, she’s pretty good at explaining her rationale. I’d like to take some credit and say it’s because I’ve always talked to her like she’s a tiny adult, but it might just be the way she is. Some examples include things like:

“Mommy, I’m going to miss you when I’m with Papi next week, but then when I’m with you, I will miss Papi. It’s hard sometimes to have two homes, but I also love having such a great family!” 

“It’s hard to be a big sister because I have to be quiet sometimes when the babies are sleeping, but I’m trying my best and that’s all that matters!”

“I don’t always like racing Kennedy and Thomas because I always lose. But that’s okay, then, when we play memory games, they lose!” Lol. Girl. But she’s not wrong.

Those are just a few examples, but I promise they are 100% verbatim and she really is such a gem. One of my personal favorites was a few weeks ago, she came up to me while I was cleaning and said, “Mommy, you know how you said that you were going to try and yell less and I was going to try to listen better?”

“Yeah,” I responded, “what about it?”

“Well, you’re not doing a very good job today,” she said very matter-of-factly.

I couldn’t help it, I burst out laughing. It led to a good conversation about how both of us could do better to fulfill our ends of the bargain, but that’s a good example of what I’m talking about.

I decided in an effort to capture her little-kid-ness, that I would do a birthday interview and record her answers. I can’t wait to do this with all of my kids in years to come, so that we have these to look back on as they grow and change in the blink of an eye.

Q: What has been your favorite thing about being five years old?

A: Maybe being with Ginger [the family dog] and also meeting my best friend Joana in kindergarten.

Q: What are you looking forward to about being six years old?

A: Playing with Ginger on my birthday.

(She’s sitting next to the dog while we do this, can you tell?)

Q: What are your favorite snacks and treats?

A: One of my favorite treats are cookies and also marshmallows and Cheetos.

Q: What are some of your favorite things to do?

A: Play with Ginger and play with my sticker book and coloring.

Q: What do you want to be when you grow up?

A: An artist.

Q: Where is somewhere you travelled while you were five? What did you do?

A: Well, I went on a field trip during kindergarten to the children’s museum, and I had so much fun!

Q: Yeah? Where else did you go?

A: That’s it.

(She went to Utah literally one month ago, for the record, as well as to the mountains and to Washington, D.C. lol)

Q: Where do you want to travel when you are six?

A: Maybe I want to travel to Utah and hang out with Otro Mimi.

(She calls my mom “Mimi,” and then my mom’s twin is “Otro Mimi,” Spanish for “Other Mimi”)

Q: You gained two new baby sisters this year! What’s it like being a big sister?

A: I like it but it’s hard sometimes because I have to try and be quiet, and I don’t like doing that.

Q: What are your favorite ways to make yourself happy?

A: Putting stickers on my shirts.

Q: What are your favorite ways to make other people happy?

A: Trying to play with them and also asking them to be my friend.

Q: What’s your favorite animal and why?

A: A triceratops because it has “Sara” in it’s name.

(Sara is my best friend who is basically her honorary aunt at this point.)

Q: What birthday present do you want to get this year?

A: I hope I get a stuffed dog or cat! And I want the dog to look like Ginger.

Happy birthday, sweet girl!! Mommy loves you so much, and I can’t wait to see everything you accomplish this next year. You’ll forever be my little girl.