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I’m just now getting around to finishing this week’s newsletter at almost 10:00pm on the day I usually post, if that tells you anything about how my week has been!
It has been a very busy but very good week. I saw someone refer to this time of year as “May-cember” and that couldn’t be more accurate! Our oldest recently performed in a musical, our second oldest is finishing up kindergarten this next week and has a dance recital the following week, our middle child is about to graduate preschool, the twins turned three months old and become more interactive every day, and even the dog recently had her annual check-up. And let’s not forget, I’m still working full-time as part of the residency program at my law school, I have a final coming up in just over two weeks, and I need to start studying for the MPRE! So yeah, it’s crazy over here!
Through it all, though, I am finding ways to still stay grounded. Running, walking, and spending time outside has helped clear my mind and bring me peace. I make an effort to find something to be thankful for every day, especially if it’s something I would otherwise take for granted. For example, it really hit me this week as I was unloading groceries just how lucky I am to have a fridge full of food. Money has quite honestly never been tighter, so I am beyond grateful that we are still able to put food on the table. Not only that, but goodfood!
Some weeks this newsletter is a place where I write about all of the fun adventures we had during the week, or I share thoughts that have been weighing on my mind. But this week, I just want the focus on one thing: gratitude.
Week #16 Favorites
- Alani energy drinks. Avoiding caffeine while pumping lasted about three months. I give up! Between working full-time, class, parenting, and now running at 5am, I have been tired. These used to be my go-to energy drinks before pregnancy, but I couldn’t stomach them for nearly my whole pregnancy due to nausea. Thankfully, they taste good to me again, so I’ve been enjoying the occasionally to help keep me going on long days!
- My washing machine and dishwasher. On Saturday, I found a puddle under our couch and realized that our washing machine was leaking. Then, I discovered that the puddle was so large, that the legs on our giant bookcase were soaked and falling apart, meaning that the leak had been there for awhile. I spent the next several hours emptying the bookshelf, rearranging furniture, texting my landlord, and looking for an appliance repairman. By the end of the day, I was worn out and short $280, but the washer was fixed. The whole ordeal, while frustrating, made me realize just how much I rely on appliances like my washing machine and dishwasher, because as a family of seven, there is a lot to clean! There was no dishwasher in my first apartment when I brought my first daughter home from the hospital, and I used to daydream about when I no longer had to wash dishes by hand. Well, that daydream is my reality now! How lucky I am for that.
- Oatmeal cream pies. This is another one of those snacks that the moms in the pumping. Facebook group supply swear helps milk supply, and since I love these treats, I figured it couldn’t hurt to try! I used to fuel during long runs with oatmeal cream pies as a part of ultramarathon training, so using them again (but this time for milk supply) has allowed me to reminisce on lots of good memories. Breastfeeding twins certainly feels like an ultramarathon of sorts!
Week #17 Highlights
- I MADE IT TO THE 5AM RUNNING GROUP!! I missed it on Tuesday, but Wednesday and Thursday, I was able to make it! Since I am exclusively pumping, I can only really run immediately following a pumping session. But since I pump on a schedule, this means the only times I can run are 5am, 8:30am, 1pm, or 5pm. Obviously at 8:30am and 1pm, I’m working, so I have been running at 5pm after work. The hard part about that is (1) I’m usually starving and (2) it’s starting to get hot. The group I ran with back in 2022 when I first started running still meets at 5am most weekdays, so my husband and I came up with a game plan in order to make it possible for me to run at 5am. It was amazing! It’s been indescribably nice to run with friends again, and it’s been easier to have my runs out of the way by time I get home from work. It does mean I’m starving by the time I get to work, so I’ve had to pack more snacks, but it’s been worth it! I can’t wait to get in more pre-sunrise runs this next week!
2. The twins turned three months old! I cannot believe that they are a quarter of a year old! This past month has been especially fun as they’ve found their voice and are learning to move and groove. Emersyn now consistently sleeps through the night and is the smiliest baby ever, and she loves to coo back and forth. Evelyn still likes to party around 3:00am most nights, but she has mastered rolling and loves to see how far she can make it before we catch her! I caught them really looking at each other once, both of them smiling, but the moment was fleeting. I’m excited to watch them continue to get to know each other in the coming months!
3. I survived another month of exclusively pumping! This is hard, and some days, I hate it. I’m constantly torn between feeling like I’m not helping enough because I have to take “breaks” to pump (at work and at home) and feeling the constant pressure and anxiety around being the sole food source for two humans. I am always monitoring my daily output, and measuring it against how much the twins have eaten that day, and tracking every single ounce both in the fridge and in the freezer. Honestly, I probably need to chill out a little. But despite it all, I was able to push through another month, and that calls for a celebration. I made 13.65 gallons of milk these past four weeks, bringing me to a grand total of nearly 40 gallons since the twins were born! Can I get a mooooo?
Self-Care Tip of the Week: Adjust Your Goals
Prior to law school, I ran ultramarathons. Something I really struggled with was always moving the finish line and never being happy with or proud of my accomplishments (more on this here).
As I’ve started consistently running again, one thing I’ve tried to avoid is setting any hard-and-fast goals. It has been tempting to say, “I want to run a half marathon by the end of the year,” or “I want to get a PR in the 5k within twelve months,” but instead I’m trying to set more non-specific goals. For example, I want to be able to run the whole loop around a lake near my house, because I used to love to run there, and I want to be able to join my friends for the entirety of their runs because I enjoy the company. Basically, I want to have fun! Focusing on those goals, instead of numbers or deadlines, has made my return to running much more enjoyable. And my hope is that it makes my running more sustainable moving forward, too!
Whatever goals you have in your life right now, I would encourage you to reevaluate whether they’re really working for you right now. If having number-driven goals works for you right now, then amazing! But if you notice it’s just adding more stress and pressure to an already busy life, maybe try and brainstorm modified goals you can set that will still help you accomplish those goals. Remember that there is a season of life for everything!
Thanks for joining me for another week, friends!
Step by Step Parenting 